


Turnabout Yuletide

by Rabbit



Category: Phoenix Wright (game)
Genre: F/M, M/M, Yuletide, challenge:Yuletide 2006
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-11
Updated: 2013-04-11
Packaged: 2017-12-08 04:45:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,888
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/757194
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rabbit/pseuds/Rabbit
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A Secret Santa swap for the gang leads to shocking revelations.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Turnabout Yuletide

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Croik](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Croik/gifts).



> This was probably the hardest fic I have ever written in my life. And I was completely daunted by the coolty of my recipient. But I hope it is enjoyed. Bisous!

"So who'd you get, Pal?" Detective Dick Gumshoe jogged up to Maya in the lobby of the district courthouse and clapped one of his overlarge hands on her shoulder, grinning broadly.

"Detective Gumshoe!" Maya Fey blinked up at him in surprise and mild consternation. He looked... cheerful was a understatement, but it was still disconcerting seeing him without his shabby old green trenchcoat. The coat had disappeared, suddenly, after the Engarde trial back in March. He'd picked up a new coat in faded red, but this one was only a windbreaker and fit somewhat awkwardly over his large frame. "The point of the district arranging for a 'Secret Santa' exchange is that the recipients and givers are supposed to remain a secret. I can't tell you that." She dropped her gaze with a frown, "besides, you'd probably just go and blab to him anyway. You're incapable of keeping a secret!"

"I am not!" bellowed Gumshoe, "I... hey!" sudden insight illuminated his face, "You got prosecutor Edgeworth, didn't you?"

Maya stared, stricken. "I... oh!"

Gumshoe threw back his head laughing, and nearly knocked the poor girl over with another hearty thump on the back, "It's okay, pal! I was just askin' 'cause I got your pal Wright... and, well..." He scratched the back of his head, "I kinda wanted to ask you... what sort of stuff does he like? Cause I really got no idea... other than, y'know... hair gel. And pointin' vehemently at stuff. "

Maya stared up at his big, earnest face, feeling somewhat at a loss. "Um... hm. Well... I suppose I could help you with that... though hey, what do you think prosecutor Edgeworth wants? I mean, other than... tea. Or maybe a gift certificate to some dry cleaners, for a month of free cravat pressing...."

"Naw, that's already... I mean, he's already got so... I mean, that's taken care of. And it's a _jabot_ anyway, not a cravat." He added the last with a smug snap. Maya stared at him, dumbfounded.

"How do you even know...?"

"Well, you pick up a thing or two, when you're as close as Mr. Edgeworth and me..." This line of conversation was suddenly and viciously interrupted by the swift crack of a whip, neatly slicing off the end of Gumshoe's scentence, and nearly the tip of his nose as well.

"Even foolish fool like you two ought to be able to see it," Franzizka Von Karma planted her gloves on her hips and glared at the detective, who flinched severely and tried not to hide behind Maya, who found herself likewise treated to a healthy dose of Prosecutor Von Karma's leathern wrath.

"Ow!" She cried, "what did _I_ do?"

"...And what is she doing back here?" Gumshoe whimpered, though this went ignored by all.

"That was for being almost as much of a foolish fool as this fool here!" Gumshoe whimpered in agony at another crack of the whip across his face,

"Hey, cut that out! You lay off of him!" Maya's indignation was broken off at another swipe from Franziska, and turning it into an "eep!" of alarm.

"Silence!" Franziska snarled, shoving a finger in Maya's face "I'm sick to death of both of you. You, you sniveling little snipe, following around that pincushion-headed menace who is responsible for defiling my little brother..."

"HEY!" Gumshoe valiantly interposed himself between the two women, "Whaddya mean, de-filing...?"

"Exactly that," Franziska pulled back, composing herself a bit, "ever since the Engarde case... have you not seen it, Mr. Scruffy Detective?"

"Seen what?" Gumshoe blinked dumbly.

"It is as plain as the bandage on your scruffy, foolish face! The way that Mr. Phoenix Wright looks at him? The way he and Mr. Miles Edgeworth have been constantly together... even in the evenings... since that miserable little affair?"

"Wha-at?" Maya looked up at Gumshoe, who looked even more lost than before. Franziska scowled at them both, shaking her head in utter and complete pity for their lack of comprehension.

"I see that I will have to spell it out for you fools." She snapped her whip tight, "Miles Edgeworth and Phoenix Wright have become lovers!"

Gumshoe and Maya stared at Franziska, their expressions such twin looks of utter and complete blank shock that the prosecutor could not contain a sardonic snicker.

"What, Nick? Never, I mean, he... Edgeworth... that's... impossible!"

"Why? Why is that impossible? Save that Mr. Miles Edgeworth ought to have better taste and discrimination than that... it has become more than obvious to _me_ however, in the past few months, that my little brother has become nothing more than a disgrace to his teaching and upbringing... and it is all Mr. Phoenix Wright's fault!"

"Hey! Don't you talk about Nick that... OWWWWWWW!!" Maya shrieked as Franziska rather forcibly interrupted her outburst once again.

"One more word out of you, little fool, and you will taste more than just than agony of defeat."

"That doesn't even make sense," Maya muttered, but the cream of Von Karma's sentiment was more than clear to everyone present. As such, Gumshoe swallowed the, 'Hey, don't you talk about Mr. Edgeworth that way!' which had been about to erupt from his lips.

"GAH!" Franziska chose not to further lower herself arguing with the detective and the medium, instead letting her whip do a goodly amount of lecturing for her before storming off down the courthouse steps and into a taxi, which screeched to a halt for her at that eloquent weapon's insistence. Maya and Gumshoe watched the cab peel off into the late afternoon, then stood there for some time longer, gazing into the distance.

"Do you really think...?" Maya said faintly, her thoughts having drifted back to the salient point.

"Naw. Couldn't be." Gumshoe said, but he sounded in no wise convinced by this. One or two things occurring to him, not exactly suddenly.

After all, Edgeworth and Wright _were_ spending an uncommon amount of time together lately. And certain things... well, even if Maya thought they were impossible, to Gumshoe... well, some possibilities did exist. They had to. Or else... he cleared his throat and looked down at the Spirit Medium, who still looked distressingly as if she had been struck by a bolt of lightning.

"Uh... You wanna go grab a burger or somethin?" Gumshoe stuck his hands in his pockets glumly and Maya nodded her head. Together they drifted down the courthouse steps and into the snow.

***

Neither of them being affluent enough to afford a taxi and food on the same evening, Maya and Gumshoe walked to a cheap diner down the way from the courthouse, where a bunch of the officials, staffers, and cops liked to eat. The place was all festived up for the holiday: artfully draped fake pine garlands, plastic holly, and cheery christmas music brightening the air. The only thing that was not cheery and bright were their two faces as they slid into a booth, staring at their menus to avoid conversation as long as possible.

In the end, they both settled on fries, burgers, and coffee. As per usual.

"So... whaddya see in a guy like Wright anyway?" Gumshoe poked at a blob of ketchup with a fry, after the food had finally come. Maya made a face.

"What do you mean by that?"

"Well..." He looked over at the jukebox, currently squelching out, 'jingle bell rock,' "I dunno. Just a hunch, I guess, but it seemed to me that you n' he are... close. Y'know, closer than most buds. Almost... well, can ya keep a secret?"

She blinked at him. "Huh? Sure..."

"Well... I mean, I kinda guessed... that you feel about Wright kinda... well, the way I feel about Mr. Edgeworth. If y'know what I mean."

For several long moments (during which the fries became almost inedibly cold) it seemed as if Maya did not, in fact, have the slightest idea what Gumshoe meant by this, until suddenly a flash of inspiration arrived with another steaming pot of coffee and the opening strains of, 'Baby, it's cold outside.'

"Oh! You mean you... for Mr. Edgeworth... you..."

The plastic holly in the garlands had nothing on Gumshoe's cheeks for redness at this moment, but he nodded just the same.

"So... well, granted, Wright's a nice enough guy... and he's helped out Mr. Edgeworth in a spot, but still..."

"Hmph." Maya broke him off with a frown, crossing her arms over her chest, "Well, What do _you_ see in Miles Edgeworth?"

"Oh... well, c'mon! He n' I go together like... I dunno, like... like burgers and fries! I get the evidence on the bad guys, and he puts 'em away. It's a real... symbiotic relationship." He grinned smugly at that, catching Maya somewhere between an eye roll and startlement that Gumshoe even knew a word with that many syllables. "Hey look pal, I'm a detective because I believe in the law, y'know? Doesn't mean I'm dumb. I read things."

"Oh yeah? Like what, comic books?"

"Well actually... yeah." He scratched the back of his head, "and other things too! Like... um... Moby Dick!"

"Really?"

"Well... it was a long time ago." He rubbed the back of his neck in embarrassment, "like, when I was five. And my mom read it to me. But hey! I also read 'True Detective stories'!"

"Riiight." Maya snickered behind her hand, but Gumshoe stopped himself before he bellowed at her. Truth was, he wasn't in the mood for bellowing. At all. Honestly. He sighed heavily.

"See... What Ms. Von Karma said back there... I think... I think she might have been right about that."

"What!?" Maya stared at him, "You can't really think that, detective!"

"Well... y'see, Mr. Edgeworth... I've known for a long time he was... well, not really interested in women, y'know?" He kept his gaze fixed solidly on the jukebox, "I mean, when you're as close as Mr. Edgeworth n' me, it's hard not to pick up some things about people. N'that... well, that was... pretty darn obvious. To me anyway, considering. I mean, you've been in his office, right?"

"Well... yeah," Maya conceded, "But it's not him that I'm surprised about. I mean... but Nick! Well, while as much as Pearly brings it up, he and I never... yet, but... I thought... well, I thought he still had a thing for my sister!"

"Your sister?"

"Yeah! Mia's death... it was more than a year ago, but some wounds take a long time to heal... especially when I've been channelling her on and off. I can tell... she really loved him, you know?" Maya stared at the jukebox too, "I just thought that when he'd had enough time..." Her gaze snapped back to Gumshoe suddenly "Hey! What about you!? You don't exactly fit the profile of a..."

"Well, ahem, yeah... um..." Gumshoe coughed into the collar of his windbreaker, "...I know that, but I've pretty much gotten through life on bein'... y'know, imposing. Havin' a big voice and a very... detective-ish manner. Ever since I was a kid, I always wanted to be on the force... I grew up watchin' those old black and white movies, y'know... with Bogart an' Alan Ladd an' Cagney and such... Philip Marlowe and Sam Spade were always my heroes! So I modeled myself on them." He sighed, "I'm a detective before I'm anything else, y'know. And besides... I'm just... not cut out to be... all sophisticated, the way most... guys like that... well, like me, I guess... are."

"And you really think Nick...?"

"Well... okay, so Wright's not the most sophisticated guy ever... but he still seems to... bother Mr. Edgeworth in a real profound way. And I was thinkin', y'know, ever since that time... I mean, I admittedly thought you n' he _were_..."

Maya sighed, and pushed away the rest of her hamburger.

"You gonna... naw, I can't really finish mine either." Gumshoe pushed his away too, the coffee sitting heavily in his stomach.

"Detective Gumshoe... Dick..." Maya stared down at the floor, then back up at him suddenly, "you can't think like that!"

"Huh?"

"You can't be all down on yourself... thinking that you're not good enough for... certain people."

"But I never said..."

"It's obvious!" Maya slammed a fist on the table, "You're always tearing yourself down, in comparison to Edgeworth! Just because he's all sophisticated and elegant and poised... well, who really cares about that stuff anyway? How important is that, next to a good heart and kindness!?"

"Well... I kinda care about that stuff, pal" Gumshoe mumbled, "And Mr. Edgeworth has a good heart. And kindness. I mean, he helped out rescuing you, when you were in trouble, didn't he?"

"But still!" Maya would have persisted in this vein, but Gumshoe cleared his throat,

"Anyway, this still doesn't solve the original problem... What to get Wright and Mr. Edgeworth for the gift exchange."

"...Yeah." Maya stared down into her coffee mug, "Um... any ideas?"

"...no. Not one."

"Here's your check!" The waitress appeared suddenly at their table with the bill, "And have a merry Christmas!"

"Er... thanks!" said Maya, as the pair of them found themselves completely occupied with trying to find enough change to scrape together to pay for both of their meals. After digging up a few crumpled singles from within Gumshoe's socks, (something which prevented anyone from sitting at any table within a four-foot radius for a while), and all the coins in Maya's pockets, they finally had covered the whole bill plus tip, and trudged back out into the cold.

"Well... I guess I'd better get on home. My cat's probably wondering where I am."

"Yeah." Maya watched the snow drift down around them, and looked back up at the despondent detective. "Hey Detective... Dick. You remember what I said in there, okay? You're a really great guy... you may not be the most elegant person ever, but you're more than sophisticated enough where it counts."

"Thanks, pal."

Maya smiled up at the detective, forced but heartfelt. He grinned back gratefully and, after a moment, pulled her up into a very large hug.

"OOF!" said Maya, caught quite by surprise.

"I mean it," the detective set her down and gave her hair a ruffle, "I mean... I still feel pretty.. well, you know, but... yeah. You're probably the nicest person I've ever met!" He looked away, back at the jukebox through the frosted diner window, "Um. I'm not really good at..."

Maya swallowed a sudden, unsolicited giggle at the smattering of red across Gumshoe's cheeks. He was pretty adorable when he blushed. She reached for his large, warm hand and gave it a squeeze.

"Thanks, Dick." She beamed up at him, her expression likewise one of profound gratitude.

"Anytime, Pa... Maya."

"Hey!" she stopped him, just before he drifted off, "If you think of anything for Mr. Edgeworth... call me, okay? And I'll call you if I think of something good for Nick." She gave him a card with her number on it, which he took and tucked into his pocket.

"Okay." He grinned. "Thanks again!"

He watched wistfully as she waved at him once more, then ran off into the night.

***

Gumshoe arrived back at his apartment just before midnight, struggling out of his windbreaker and hanging it up on the hook on the back of the hall closet door. His broad, open face turned low and troubled as he went through the motions of arriving home, scarcely conscious of the demanding meows of his cat, Onigiri, as she pawed at his trouser leg until he got to the part of the ritual where he opened her a can of tuna and plunked it on the floor. She gave him another, chiding mrrrow and a good solid swipe of claw for arriving home so late before turning her attention to her dinner with a contented purr. Gumshoe managed a little smile as he gave her a much nicer scratch than the one she'd given him, between the ears, "Shoulda named ya Franziska. Awww." She paused in her munching to lick his fingers, then returned to her meal. The detective pulled off his shoes and wandered into the tiny, cramped living room, plopping onto the worn out sofa and turning on the fuzzy little television for some kind of background noise. The talk with Maya really had made him feel better, but still... the whole thing... bothered him. A lot.

And he still had no idea what to get Phoenix Wright for Christmas.

He decided to put in something to watch to take his mind off of things. Like... 'Double Indemnity' or 'White Heat,' or maybe 'The Maltese Falcon'... he was standing in front of the little shelf of videos by his television when his phone rang.

"Gumshoe here." he replied automatically.

"Detective Gumshoe." The voice on the other end was quiet, but unmistakable.

"M-Mr. Edgeworth!"

"Yes." there was a pause. An oddly awkward pause, Gumshoe thought, or would have thought, if he'd managed to think of much of anything at all right at that moment.

"Um... did you need anything, Mr. Edgeworth?"

"I... I have something for you. May I come upstairs?"

"Y-you're here?" Gumshoe blinked dumbly, drawing an intensely curious expression from his cat.

"Yes. I am right downstairs."

"Well... uh, sure! I mean... it's not... um, well, I hadn't expected a visit..."

"I'll be up in a moment." The phone clicked off, and Gumshoe stared at the cell in his hand in mute amazement. What on earth was going on, tonight of all damn nights? Either way, he had enough presence of mind to kick a few issues of 'True Crime' under the couch and put on a kettle of hot water (he always kept some spare teabags around, in case Edgeworth ever ran out at his office and needed to have some brought by in a hurry), before the expected knock came at his door.

"Mr. Edgeworth!" the prosecutor fixed the detective with his customary steely glare as the latter opened the door, and brushed in past him without a word. Gumshoe closed the door behind him, even more baffled than previous, "S-sir! Wha-what're you..."

"Detective Gumshoe." This simple phrase silenced the larger man far more effectively than even Franziska's whip, "I am no shamus, like yourself, but you'll forgive me if I've been doing a little... investigating of my own, this evening. And I have uncovered some evidence that I find... highly disturbing, that I wish to present to you."

"O-oh?" Gumshoe felt the usual heat of an impending investigation rise inside him, almost making him forget the conversations of earlier, "for a new case, sir? Who's the suspect?"

"You, detective."

This statement froze Gumshoe solid in his tracks, even more utterly speechless than he had been at any time during this decidely stupifying day.

"M-me, sir?"

"Yes." Edgeworth settled himself on the threadbare sofa, his jacket arrayed fetchingly about him, his jabot perfectly pressed, as per usual, "The kettle is whistling."

So it was. Gumshoe snapped out of his stupor to turn off the stove, and he poured the water into the tea pot with trembling hands, letting the leaves steep. He carried it, a cup, and the sugar bowl into the living room on a tray, and set it on the wobbly coffee table before his guest. Edgeworth did not even give it a glance.

"You had a rather... lengthy conversation with Maya Fey this evening, did you not?"

"Yes sir..." Gumshoe answered automatically, wondering what on earth was going on.

"I see... and where, if you will respond succinctly, did this conversation take place?"

"Well..." Gumshoe scratched the back of his head, beginning to feel curiously like he was on the witness stand, "It started on the courthouse steps, where... hey! Did you know that Prosecutor Von Karma was back in town!?"

"Franziska..." Edgeworth looked away, at Onigiri as she swished her tail thoughtfully, then leaped up into his lap with a miow. Edgeworth favoured her with a mildly surprised blink, but fell to stroking her absently as he turned his attention back to Gumshoe, "...yes, I was aware of that. But that is irrelevant for the time being. Please answer the question, detective Gumshoe!"

"Well Sir..." Gumshoe sat down heavily on a wooden footstool under the plate glass window, to the right of the couch, "... as I said, it started out at the courthouse, with Ms. Von Karma. After she left, we walked down the street to that diner... you know the one... and had a couple of burgers. Then after that, we both went home. At least I assume she went home." Gumshoe sat up suddenly straight, "Has something happened to Maya!?"

"..." Edgeworth's expression made Gumshoe swallow a very large lump in his throat. "...no, to my knowledge, Maya Fey is unharmed. Did you see anyone else, tonight?"

"Uh... no, not until you showed up..." The tea had probably steeped long enough, but Gumshoe's hands were shaking even worse than before as he poured Edgeworth a cup, dropping a couple lumps of sugar in for him, "can I ask, Sir, what this is all about... I mean, what I'm accused of...?"

"I will ask the questions, detective." He broke off petting the cat long enough to have a sip of tea, nodding his approval of the taste, "Now. What was the subject of your conversation with Ms. Maya Fey?"

"Um..." Gumshoe's felt his face beginning to break out in spots of scarlet, "Uh, well... we... we were talking about... about... the Secret Santa swap down at the precinct, sir!"

"I see." Edgeworth fixed Gumshoe again like Jack Hammer on the samurai spear, "Detective Gumshoe! You would lie... to me..?"

"N-no sir!" stammered the detective, helplessly.

"A certain witness observed you leaving the diner," Edgeworth stood up, setting Onigiri on the floor, much to her irritation, "You were seen to give Maya Fey a very... intimate hug, to receive a squeeze to your right hand, and to accept from her a note, on which, according to my witness, was written her phone number! Do you deny this!?"

"N-no... but what has that got to do with...?"

"Silence!" Edgeworth slammed his hand down on the counter between the kitchen and the living room as if it were a prosecutor's table, "Now, I will ask you once more... what was the true topic of the conversation between you and Ms. Maya Fey!?"

"The... the true topic..." Gumshoe swallowed again, hard. "Well... it was... well, about something that Prosecutor Von Karma said, outside the courthouse..."

"Oh?" Edgeworth raised an eyebrow, "And pray tell, what was that, detective Gumshoe?"

"Um... I really... don't..."

"OUT WITH IT!" He snapped, slamming the table again and bringing Gumshoe once more fully upright.

"Sir! It was... it was about you... and Defense Attorney Phoenix Wright, Sir!"

"Oh oh?" This, finally, seemed to cause Edgeworth some surprise. He picked up his tea again and took a long sip. "And what did Franziska have to say... about myself and Defense attorney Wright?"

"She... well, she implied... something. Um, please don't make me say it, sir..."

"Please, detective Gumshoe... she is, after all, something like a sister to me." Edgeworth crossed his arms, and Gumshoe wondered if his throat was ever going to be anything other than a desert ever again. He had not brought a cup for himself, but looked longingly at the teapot, too terrified to move before answered the question.

"Well she said... she said that you... and Mr. Wright... that you were... were... lovers." The last word was barely squeaked out, but Edgeworth seemed to have no problem catching it. In fact, he was already dropping his eyes in dawning awareness before Gumshoe had even finished.

"I see." the ice in Edgeworth's voice could have welded the feet of penguins to the floors of igloos, "thank you, detective Gumshoe. I will... discuss this matter with Franziska later. But the fact remains..." He set his teacup down on the counter with a ringing clatter, "that you seem to have seen fit to seek some form of comfort in the arms of Maya Fey, a woman who is clearly and obviously, in spite of anything... Franziska might have said, involved with one Phoenix Wright!?"

"N-No!!" Gumshoe exploded in shock, his jaw flirting madly with his necktie, "I mean... never! Me n'Maya... no! It wasn't like that at all!"

"Oh it wasn't, was it?" Edgeworth said coldly, coming closer to the stool on which Gumshoe perched, "Then why did Maya Fey give you her personal phone number?"

"That was for the swap, sir," said Gumshoe glumly, "she really did want my help... and I asked her first, 'cause I pulled Wright's name out of the hat..."

"...Ah." Edgeworth looked down again, his long hair covering his eyes and rendering his expression unreadable. "Perhaps... perhaps my witness read the situation... incorrectly. Nonetheless. I brought you this." Gumshoe did not see from whence it came, but quite suddenly, Edgeworth was holding in his hands his familiar old green coat, just as worn-out and threadbare as the last time he'd seen it.

"Hey!" Gumshoe beamed in surprised delight, "Where'd you find that, pal!?"

"...Franziska had it. She brought it back for you. Apparently, she did not see fit to return it to you. I... have checked it for tracking devices myself."

"Thanks, Mr. Edgeworth!" Gumshoe stood and took the coat, sliding it on even though it was fairly warm in his little apartment. He hugged himself in it tightly, like an old friend. "Boy, have I missed you!"

Edgeworth watched this with a small smile. "...Gumshoe... Dick." He raised an eyebrow, "About what Franziska said... you didn't believe it, did you?"

"Um... well..." he did not need to finish. Edgeworth chuckled under his breath, and shook his head.

"Hardly. Phoenix Wright... is not exactly my type. Besides, as I insinuated before... he is otherwise inclined."

"Wi... with Maya? You mean he really /does/..."

"Well, yes. I think so, anyway. Although he may not be entirely aware of that himself."

"Wow! What a relief! I mean... she'll be..." He was not permitted to finish this, however, due to Edgeworth's mouth all of a sudden being quite fixed onto his own. His utter and complete surprise at this was soon overwhelmed by the kind of giddy acceptance that happens to people when they are having very, very good dreams, especially at the point wherein Miles Edgeworth's hands were tucked quite firmly both beneath his coat and digging into the small of his back.

Gumshoe was pretty sure that this was what was generally referred to as 'kissing', or more properly, 'making out', at least, by the time that there was a pause found in it.

"Wow," said Gumshoe, at that particular point. Or gasped. Edgeworth grinned broadly and pulled back, freeing his hands once more, much to the detective's regret.

"As I said. Phoenix Wright is not my type."

"But..." Edgeworth silenced him quickly with another rather deep kiss.

"So. You..." he looked around the apartment, and then down at the cat pawing at his trouser leg, "tell me, Detective Gumshoe... how does your cat get along with dogs?"

"I really can't say, Sir..."

"Miles, Dick. My name is Miles. Please feel free to refer to me as such. At least, when we are not in the courtroom."

"Um. Miles. Sure thing Si.. pa... Miles." he chuckled at this, grinning and blushing and trying not to faint. Edgeworth chuckled.

"Well. Perhaps... we'll have to find out. Quite soon. Now... it's quite late. If you don't object, I have every intention of remaining here tonight... preferably, in your bed. Do you?"

"Do I.... what?" Gumshoe gasped, creating a whole new definition for 'flabbergasted,'

"Object, Dick."

"Um... no no..." he snickered, blushing, "whadda I look like, a lawyer?"

"Thank goodness, no." Edgeworth laughed, sliding off his burgundy jacket and laying it across the sofa, thusly and entirely fixing Gumshoe's attention. Save for one, small detail.

"Um... S... Miles. I've got... can I ask... one thing, first?"

"Hm?" Edgeworth paused, halfway down the hallway (all of three steps), with his hand on the door to the restroom, "and what is that, detective?"

"Well... who's your... 'witness', anyway!" he blurted out, frowning. Edgeworth laughed again and waggled a finger out him.

"Now now, Dick. A Prosecutor, like a reporter, does not reveal his sources, if he is not in court. Now. I'll be right back, after I freshen up. In the meantime... check the pocket of your coat. I think you'll find something there of interest to you."

"Oh..." Gumshoe stared as the bathroom door shut behind the prosecutor and slid his hand into the pocket, fishing around till his hand closed on a thin piece of paper. He took it out and stared at it, recognizing it instantly as the card he'd taken from Shelly de Killer's hideout... a drawing of Phoenix Wright on one of the 'shell' calling cards, 'Nick' written under it. In Maya Fey's handwriting. He stared at it for a long moment, then looked up in sudden inspiration. Chuckling, he slid it back into his pocket, then took off the trenchcoat and hung it up, before heading back into the bedroom.

He now knew exactly what he was going to give Phoenix Wright for the Christmas swap.


End file.
